His vision was still a bit blurry, he grabbed his head with one hand. “Ugh…I’m fine…I don’t know…the last thing I remember was gas which came out of his knife as it hit my bow…then everything went dark…” He tried getting up, stumbling a bit, still dizzy from the gas.
He bit his lip, observing the archer cautiously. He did not show any signs of intoxication, if anything, he appeared to be coming to quite fast, the colour visibly returning to his cheeks. He frowned. What did Knightmare plan to gain from this…?
“It would seem… you truly are unharmed,” he informed the red head after he carefully inspected him for any other possible injuries. He bit his lip as he stood, leaning down slightly and offering a hand to help the other get up. “I would still advise we return to the Cave asap for a proper examination,” he continued, his voice a tad more formal than he would normally deem it necessary around Roy.
“I don’t know what he wants….he’s just a plain psychopath who enjoys doing things like this…ugh…uh yeah, that’d be a good idea…” It all started coming back now, the way Kaldur’s tone of voice changed, what he did to him….and it was slowly killing him inside…he had to clear everything…He headed towards the zeta tube entrance and bit and bit his lip. “Listen…about the whole Hal Jordan thing….you know I would never do something like that to you….let me at least uh….shit….”
Kaldur frowned, his pace slowing down a bit. “That is not necessary right now, my friend,” he interrupted the archer, pressing his lips together slightly. “We can talk once you are fully recovered.” And he meant that. Perhaps… perhaps if Roy would get a chance to explain, then…
The heavy feeling of something clutching his heart had not yet left, but as of now… Roy needed him. He had to be better than that.
“Do you require any assistance?” he asked the red headed archer, offering to support him if it need be, his voice still slightly… distant.
He stopped walking and gritted his teeth a little. “Of course it’s necessary….gee Kal! I can’t let this go just like that….fuck…What I did was wrong and horrible and I’m sorry for it….and no…I’m fine…” He said the last part quietly and just stood there. “I know you must probably hate my guts by now…so…you have the right to just go if you don’t want to talk about it…I don’t deserve someone as perfect like you anyway. Not with my fucked-up life as it is anyway…I don’t want to mess up yours too…”
He now stopped completely too, turning towards the archer. His eyes widened slightly as he heard Roy’s confession. Hate him? The thought of hating him never even occurred to Kaldur. Yes, Roy had hurt him, perhaps, but he was still… Roy, Red Arrow, that same stubborn archer Kaldur always respected and admired. And perhaps his mind and the thoughts he tried to suppress so passionately kept telling him to resent the archer for what he did, but deep down he knew that in the end, underneath it all, Roy was still… his best friend.
He stood there in silence for a few moments, before he finally gathered the courage to look up and meet Roy’s eyes, his expression softening slightly.
“You are a fool, my friend,” he finally spoke quietly. “You cannot truly believe I would merely forget my affections and hate you mindlessly?” he spoke in a determined tone. “You are… a better person than you would care to give yourself credit for, Roy. And I would not be standing here if I had ever thought otherwise.”
He then once again looked down, biting his lip as he, deep down, made a decision. “I-… I am willing to listen.”
He gulped hard. “Well…I went to his place to hang out, we had something to drink, ordered a few pizzas. No big deal. We played truth or dare, as bored as we were with nothing to do and sooner or later we were both totally drunk…and he started hitting on me, until alcohol took over and we made out….and I’ll say this again, I’m sorry, Kal…..Told you how it happened…now you can hate me all you want…” He looked down at the floor and bit his lip.
Kaldur waited and listened to Roy quietly as he explained what happened. He saw the pained expression on the archer’s face normally determined face, he could sense the regret behind the mask, the vulnerability he did not know the other possessed. And then… he remembered the times when it was him who felt unable to go on and the archer who had offered his support. And so in the end, it wasn’t Roy’s side of the story that ultimately made his mind.
He said nothing for a while, he just stood there, his expression calm and unreadable, before he closed in on Roy’s face and simply brushed his lips against his.
“I thought I had made it clear I have no intention of hating you.”